Break-ups are never pleasant. One moment, you’re sobbing. The next, you feel relieved, and then you’re feeling guilty again. There’s no roadmap to follow and no one to understand what you’re going through.
The last thing you want to do is work through the admin associated with break-ups. But tackling these tedious topics now can save you heartache down the road. Like going no-contact, it’s helpful to dig in and get the dirty work done.
In this article, you’ll find a complete guide to settling break-up admin. From sorting through shared subscriptions to updating your emergency contacts, it’s time to retake ownership of your life.
You’ll thank yourself, we promise!
OK, before we dive into the to-do list, we’ll quickly define break-up admin for all those with confused looks on their faces.
Break-up admin refers to all the practical tasks you must complete after a break-up.
The end of a relationship is a highly emotional time, and the last thing you want to do is divide up assets or try to get your old jumper back. However, getting it done is critical, especially if you want to move on and cut ties.
We’ve prepared a list of the main tasks you must cover after your relationship ends. They’re not all pleasant, but you can do it. Think of us as your break-up guide.
In a few months, you’ll be thankful you did the work and haven’t dragged out the ending. Let’s get into it.
Sorting your emergency contacts always feels like something you can put off. But trust us on this one. You need to update them first. From your dentist to work emergency numbers, switch your ex for your family.
Step two depends on whether or not you live together. For today, we’re focusing on couples who aren’t in the same house.
Gather your ex’s stuff and put it in a box. All of their clothes, gadgets, toiletries, sex toys – the lot. This way, you can quickly and painlessly give it back to them. Hopefully, they’ll be courteous enough to do the same for you.
If you have a pet, it’s time to make a tough decision. Sharing custody of a pet isn’t the same as sharing custody of children; shared custody rarely works.
In the eyes of UK law, a pet actually counts as property. So, it depends on who bought the fur baby or whether it was a gift. If you purchased it, the pet is yours. If it was gifted to you, the pet is yours.
A clear conversation is the best way to navigate pet problems. Sometimes, you might want to share ownership. But be warned, this can become difficult in the future.
Sending nudes isn’t so taboo in a relationship. However, owning the nudes after a break-up is.
Remind your ex to delete naked pictures or saucy videos. And while you’re at it – delete any you own.
In modern life, sharing subscription services is a form of digital commitment. So, when it all ends, it’s time to fund your own Netflix account.
If you control the streaming services, you can simply remove their login from your account. If your ex-partner is in control, you’ll likely try to log in one day and realise you’ve been blocked.
It feels harsh, but it’s the natural way of things these days. No one streams for free!
Nothing is more challenging than navigating a shared friendship group after a break-up.
If you’ve been together for a while, you’ve probably amassed a group of mutual friends. You’ll need to break the news to these pals to prevent any future awkward situations.
You don’t need to remove yourself from the friendships, though. Confide in your close friends and let them know you want to be buddies and that you don’t wish for your break-up to affect the relationship.
Having a friend who will tell you if your ex will be at future events can be helpful. This way, you have a heads-up before going.
If your ex knows your passwords, it’s time to change them all. Even if they’d never try to use your accounts, you should swap them all just to be safe online.
We know. This is one of the most tedious tasks. But you can make it easier by putting on a comfort film or podcast while you do it.
Deleting old photos is another tedious task and one that’s more painful. However, with the rise of ‘suggested photos’ or ‘memory’ notifications, getting rid of photos of your ex has never been more important.
There’s nothing more anxiety-inducing than your phone buzzing with a notification for a photo of your ex months after the relationship ended.
Sure, you might want to keep some vacation photos, and if you’ve been together for years, it might take too long to delete every single shot. But deleting a bulk might make you feel better in the short term.
Like your photo album, it’s time to decide if you want to delete any couple photos from your profile.
If the break-up is fresh, you might actually want to leave this one for a while. You’ll be surprised how many social media snoops will realise that the photos are missing, resulting in unwanted ‘What happened?!’ questions.
A break-up and a list of admin work? Yup, life just isn’t fair. Break-up admin is a necessary evil, though. It helps you organise your life and gives you something to focus on while feeling down. In a way, it can even be quite freeing.
Take it slow, and don’t rush if it doesn’t feel right. You’ve got this.
Read more about sex and relationships on the Vivastreet blog.
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