Boundaries help create a safe and healthy work environment for you and your client. As a sex worker, knowing how to set boundaries with your clients is essential. If you don’t establish limits, they may take advantage of you and cross your personal lines.
- Understand the importance of setting boundaries
- The boundaries to set with your clients
- Ready to set the boundaries?
Many different types of boundaries can be set, depending on the sex worker and the type of work they do. Some common boundary examples include: setting time limits, refusing certain services, or declining meetings outside of work hours.
Of course, these are examples – workers should tailor their limits to fit their unique needs and situation. If you’re not sure where to start when it comes to setting boundaries, here are a few tips.
Understand the importance of setting boundaries
The first step is to understand why setting boundaries is crucial, and once you know their importance, it will be easier for you to stick to them. Think about what you’re comfortable with, the services you’re willing to provide and be clear with your clients.
In addition, you should always agree on the terms of your engagement before any sexual activity occurs. This includes discussing things like safer sex practices, length of time, and, as mentioned previously, any other services that may be included.
To sum up, by setting and maintaining clear boundaries, you can ensure that both you and your clients have a positive and enjoyable experience.
The boundaries to set with your clients
As a sex worker, setting boundaries with your clients shouldn’t be an option, but there are many different limits you can set, depending on the type of work you do. Here are the most common and reasonable limits you should set.
Being honest about the services you offer
Being an escort is a delicate balance of providing companionship and maintaining boundaries. It is vital to be honest about the services you offer to ensure that both parties are comfortable and that there are no misunderstandings.
Depending on your comfort level, services can include anything from conversation and companionship to dinner dates, dancing to BDSM, and pegging.
By being honest and upfront about the services you offer, you can make a mutually enjoyable and respectful, pleasant experience.
Be transparent with your rates and don’t accept negotiations
Secondly, being transparent with your rates helps to build trust with your clients and ensures that there are no surprises when it comes time to pay. Of course, rates can vary depending on your services, but generally speaking, it is a good idea to list your rates on your website or in Vivastreet ad.
This way, potential clients will know precisely what they are getting and how much it will cost. Remember, being upfront about your rates shows that you are professional and trustworthy- two qualities sure to appeal to clients looking for an escort.
That being said, it isn’t uncommon for some clients to negotiate prices and try getting a discount, and it is definitely a limit you should have.
Clear communication is instrumental
Communication is key, especially as a sex worker. Your clients are looking to you for a GFE experience, and that starts with open and clear communication before you even meet. You don’t want any surprises regarding your appearance or what you’re willing to do.
Put yourself in the client’s shoes – wouldn’t you want to know if the woman you’re about to meet is willing to engage in the activities you’re interested in? Of course, you would, and that’s why communication is so important.
On the other hand, if you aren’t willing to provide any specific service, whether oral sex, A-level, or else, make sure to tell them ahead of time, despite specifying it in your listing.
So, be upfront and honest with your clients from the get-go, and you’ll be sure to make a lasting impression.
Discuss clients’ expectations ahead of time
Besides clear communication, it is always advisable to discuss the clients’ expectations ahead of time to avoid misunderstandings later. By doing so, both you and the client can be sure that you are on the same page and that the final result will meet everyone’s expectations.
You certainly don’t want your client to request things like anal sex or femdom face to face and have to refuse him last minute. This will be a waste of time and money, so make sure to discuss it ahead of time.
Don’t let clients force you to have sex without protection
Having control over your sex life and body is another essential part of the game in the adult industry. But being in control doesn’t mean you shouldn’t take precautions. You should get to decide when, where, and how you have sex, despite being your job.
This is why you should always use protection, even if your client says they don’t want to. Not only will this help to keep you safe from STDs, but it will also give you peace of mind knowing that you’re taking responsibility for your own sexual health.
Next time a client tries to pressure you into having unprotected sex, be sure to stand your ground and insist on using protection. It’s the best way to keep yourself safe and healthy.
Sharing personal details with clients
Clients pay for your time, companionship, and presence. But for you to stay safe as a sex worker, keeping some personal details to yourself is instrumental. Sharing too much information can create an uncomfortable situation or make you feel like clients are intruding on your privacy.
Of course, discretion is part of being an escort – you shouldn’t share your real name, details about your family, your home town, and any other detail that could put you at risk. On the other hand, your clients may not want their personal lives made public, so it is essential to respect their privacy as well.
By keeping some personal details to yourself, you can help create a more professional and comfortable experience without thinking about any repercussions when your client is gone.
Don’t always accept presents from clients
A gift is a wonderful way to show appreciation, but it’s essential to be mindful of the intention behind the gift. Always take the time to understand why your client is giving you a gift and what they hope to achieve with it.
If the intention is simply to show appreciation, then graciously accept and enjoy the gift. However, if you feel like the client is hoping to gain favour or influence your decision-making, then it’s best to politely decline.
Accepting gifts from clients can be tricky, but as long as you’re mindful of the intention behind the present, you’ll be able to navigate it gracefully.
Do not keep in touch with clients outside their booking
As an escort, your time is valuable, and your safety is extremely important. For this reason, once a booking is made, and the client is gone, you should not agree to date him without a new appointment or go on a date with him.
Escorts who accept contact information from clients or agree to meet them outside of their booking are putting you at risk of assault or other violence.
If a client persists after turning them down, you should give him a warning and not reply to him anymore. Remember, your time is precious, and you should only spend it with clients who respect your boundaries.
By maintaining boundaries and only accepting bookings, you can ensure to remain safe at all times.
Don’t let clients cross the line when offering BDSM, fetish, and domination services
When it comes to BDSM, fetish and domination services, you must always make sure that your clients know all the details and your boundaries. This way, there can be no surprises during the session.
The client should know what the dominatrix’s limits are, but if that is their first time, they may have no idea whatsoever, and this is where you tell them your limits beforehand.
Furthermore, it is vital to communicate concerns or questions before the session starts. While educating clients may not be the most glamorous task, it is certainly something you want to go through.
Do not take the booking if you’re in doubt
If you spot any red flags, do not take the booking – taking the risk is simply not worth it. There are plenty of other clients out there who will not make you feel uncomfortable or put you in danger. When you get a wrong gut feeling about someone, it is best to listen to your intuition and act accordingly.
After all, your safety should always be your number one priority. If you’re ever in doubt, stay on the side of caution and don’t take the booking. It’s not worth risking your safety for a few extra pounds.
Ready to set the boundaries?
Setting boundaries with your clients is an important part of being a successful freelancer. Establishing what you are and aren’t comfortable doing and ensuring your client understands these boundaries is essential.
It’s important to find a balance between being available and responsive to their needs while honouring your time and commitments. When you and your client clearly understand the working relationship, it sets the tone for a positive, professional relationship.
How do you set boundaries with your clients? What tips do you have for setting healthy boundaries with them?
