The discourse around disability often focuses on physical needs such as accessibility, employment, and healthcare, but the need for intimacy and emotional connection often remains sidelined. For many people, living with a disability can often be isolating and intimacy can be challenging. One avenue that offers a way for people with a disability to experience these essential aspects of life is sex work.
Andrew Gurza, who has cerebral palsy and is a full-time power wheelchair user, advocates for sex work as a therapeutic service for people living with a disability. On behalf of Vivastreet, he shares his powerful insight into how sex work can be life-affirming for people with disabilities.
Navigating intimacy with a disability
Andrew says, “I need help with every part of my daily life, from waking up and brushing my teeth to being positioned for sex, which creates barriers to intimacy. People are unsure of how to navigate intimacy with someone like me. Dating in itself is exhausting. I’m constantly dealing with ableism and having to explain my disability.”
For this reason, he has chosen not to actively pursue dating and instead has focused on building fulfilling experiences through sex work.
He explains, “It had got to the point where I hadn’t had sex in nearly a year and self-pleasure is extremely hard for me because my disability affects my hands. I just needed someone to need me for an hour. I kept coming back to the option of seeing a sex worker. I finally had enough money saved up for this to be an option so I reached out to a guy asking if he’d been with a disabled guy before. He said no, but was open to it. We scheduled a time and I was very nervous – there was a beautiful guy standing in front of me, but he was so gentle and kind, and accommodating, and we just learned as we went – it was so fun. I remember just being so comfortable with him. Now I have been seeing him for over 7 years.”
More than physical intimacy
Meeting with sex workers has been transformative for Andrew. He views his time with sex workers as therapeutic, likening it to other forms of therapy that disabled individuals frequently undergo, such as physical or occupational therapy.
“Reaching orgasm and being touched in a way that isn’t medical is incredibly therapeutic for me.”
In fact, his sessions are not always about sex and the benefits of sex work extend beyond physical intimacy. For Andrew, the companionship and human connection combat the isolation that often accompanies disability. “Knowing that I have the option to save up and see someone has transformed my mental health,” he says. Sometimes, he and a worker simply watch films or go shopping. “The idea that sex work is just about sex isn’t true, at least in my experience,” Andrew says. “It’s about connection, comfort, and being in a space where I feel completely at ease in my body.”
For Andrew, sex work has profoundly improved his mental health and self-esteem.
“It’s rare for a disabled person like me to feel comfortable in their body,” he explains. “But when I’m with a sex worker, I feel sexy. They see me as a person, including my disability and sexuality. It’s important to me that this isn’t one-sided. I want to ensure they are having fun too and it gives me pride to know I am providing pleasure too.”
Tackling stigma and misconceptions
Overcoming the societal stigma surrounding sex work wasn’t easy for Andrew. Sex work remains a controversial topic, and the idea of disabled people engaging in it often elicits judgment or misunderstanding. For years, Andrew felt ashamed of meeting with sex workers. “I worried about all the usual things—‘What would people think?’ or ‘Why can’t I meet someone the normal way?’” he recalls.
Initially, he would tell his mother he was going on dates. After her asking if she was going to meet the ‘mystery man’ Andrew decided to tell her. “I told her I work with sex workers. After a long pause that felt like forever, she said, ‘Good for you. If I were in your position, I’d do the same!’” This moment of acceptance from his mother was a turning point. “She understands I am a vulnerable person so as long as she knows I’m safe, she is happy for me”.
Viewing sex work as a lifeline
Andrew’s story illustrates that sex work can be a lifeline for those seeking connection, dignity, and pleasure. Society often desexualises disabled individuals, assuming they are not interested in or capable of intimacy. Through open communication and mutual respect, sex work creates spaces where these barriers can be broken down. For disabled clients, it offers a chance to experience human touch and companionship on their own terms. In countries like Australia, sex work services are partially funded through the National Disability Insurance Scheme (NDIS). Andrew believes similar models should be adopted worldwide.
“Governments should fund this for people on fixed incomes. Intimacy should be an option for everyone.”
For many people with disabilities, the sex work industry provides more than physical intimacy—it fosters self-confidence, emotional connection, and a sense of normalcy. By amplifying stories like Andrew’s, we can challenge outdated stereotypes and pave the way for a world where everyone has the opportunity to feel desired, valued, and connected. In this space, sex work is not just a profession; it is a lifeline that restores dignity and humanity to those who need it most.
